Having suffered something of a crisis of confidence with regards to my writing during the last month or so, I feel that I’m getting back on track. I’ve spent the last few weeks, in my spare time, rewriting and editing my trilogy from start to finish and doing so has refuelled my hopes for it.
I haven’t participated in any of the online writing communities this month, and frankly it’s been a weight off my shoulders. I feel now that I was spending far too much time reading and commenting on other writers’ work, whilst ignoring the work that needed doing on my own. I will gradually return to them all, but I will be spending less time on them and more time on improving my MS.
I also feel that I’d been getting too desperate for readers’ comments, even though I’d been getting little in the way of constructive feedback. Praise and support from writers I don’t know is all very nice, but I’m only too aware that the majority – Authonomists in particular – just butter you up so that you’ll do the same for them. However, when people I know don’t even comment after reading my work, then the silence is deafening; hence the crisis of confidence.
Fortunately, I’ve had a little epiphany: I’ve remembered that writing is something I’ve always done purely for my own pleasure, and that this sharing of my work is a very new thing for me. I write because I love to do so, and ultimately it doesn’t really matter if no-one else reads it or enjoys it because the very act of writing it is what brings me joy. Yes, it’s lovely to hear that readers have enjoyed my work, and yes, I’d be thrilled beyond measure to see my books in print, but essentially I write because I love to write.
With this in mind, I’ll continue work on my trilogy, and I’ll continue my dream of getting all three published, but – more importantly – I’ll continue writing, because that’s who I am.